Aveya's birth story

Jonathan is so good at writing in his journal. He wrote down Aveya's birth story on the day she was born. He got most of the story recorded, so I'm going to have him tell us the story in his own words. Anything italicized are notes I added. 

Monday, February 13, 2017

Today is Aveya’s birthday! Melissa was having contractions about 20 minutes apart for most of the day yesterday. Around dinner time, they were 5 minutes apart for about an hour but they didn't feel too intense. When she called the midwives, they told her to take a bath. The bath helped things slow down, so we thought that it was just a false alarm. About two hours after we (I) went to sleep (thankfully, it was uncharacteristically early), Melissa woke me and said that we needed to go, and that she was in active labor. I never slept. We were in bed by 9:30, but Aveya was SO ACTIVE, so I couldn't relax. Then when she started calming down the contractions started coming hard! I called the midwife again and told her they were intense. She told me to come in. So I called a friend who has seriously been such a life-saver. I had asked them beforehand if her and her husband could stay the night if I went into labor at night (I had someone planned for a middle-of-the-night call, but this was so early in the night that i just asked them because I was texting them around dinner asking them to put the kids to bed if we had to go in) I am so grateful for Morgan and Kristen Ruesch, and their willingness and cheerfulness to come over and stay at our place for the night. It was such a blessing. (Kristen had helped me at least half a dozen times in the last month and a half or so, so the kids were very familiar with her)

me and my BIG bump!

 I am grateful that the kids slept through the night for them and that Corbin didn't freak out too much like we were worried he might (apparently Cambria helped comfort him, so sweet.) I am also grateful for the priesthood. Melissa asked for a priesthood blessing before we left. Morgan and I administered to her. In the blessing, I blessed her body that it could do what it was designed to do. I blessed her mind that it could be strong and that it had been prepared by her preparation. I also blessed her with peace. In the blessing, I also said that everything would be ok. Although it may have sounded like we would have a vaginal birth that we wanted, that wasn’t necessarily what I felt. We got to the hospital around midnight. The midwife checked and Aveya was still sideways and I was dilated to a 6.5 and fully effaced. We were both disappointed, especially Melissa. We were both blessed with peace though. I am grateful for c-sections and that they can help babies and moms in otherwise dangerous situations have a healthy, safe birth. Melissa was wheeled to the OR, and I joined her shortly later. It turns out that Aveya had even turned again, and was completely feet first when they pulled her out. They said she was kicking even as they took her out. 

My experience with pain meds in labor: I hadn't ever had them before, but oh man! I can understand why people get them. I didn't feel as prepared for this birth as I was with the others (oddly enough, even though Corbin's was so early, I still felt very ready for labor with him). And as soon as I found out that I needed to have a c-section, I wasn't welcoming the contractions like I usually do. I kind of got more and more frustrated that I had to feel another one as each one came. If I was going to get a spinal, then I wanted one NOW. They told me that as soon as the medication kicked in, I would probably feel tired, considering the time of night we were there. When I got in the OR, I got a little nervous. One of the reasons why I haven't ever gotten an epidural before is because I'm so nervous to have someone stick a huge needle in my spine and potentially paralyze me. The anesthesiologist was amazing though, he talked me through everything, and told me how I was going to feel before I felt it, which eased my mind significantly. As soon as he had the spinal in, I felt like I was on cloud 9! It was amazing :). I did feel nauseous several times, not fun, but he just upped my anti nausea medicine and I felt better. The rest of the time was a blur, I was trying not to listen to the doctors on the other side of the curtain, the idea of them right there, cutting me open wasn't something I liked thinking about. Then it hit me like a load of bricks, I was tired and I physically couldn't keep my eyes open. I didn't try to keep my eyes open until I heard that Aveya was out. I heard her cry and that was the weirdest, most amazing combination of emotions and feelings. I had the same feeling I had with the other babies I've had, the pure, instant love. The desire to see her and feel her skin to skin. But at the same time I couldn't help but think "is that it? I didn't do anything! There was no work on my part to bring her here, but she's here!"

Aveya Leanne Kershaw was born at 1:52 am. She weighed 6lbs 10 oz, and was about 18.5 inches long. It was special that she was born on Danae Gough’s birthday. for those who don't know, Danae is my cousin who was killed in a car accident about a year before Cambria was born. Nae is such a special girl, and I feel like it was a tender mercy that my contractions didn't come till closer to midnight, considering how fast everything happened so that she could share Nae's birthday. Cambria shares her middle name, and now Aveya shares her birthday.

It is hard to describe the feeling after seeing her for the first time. I just couldn’t stop smiling. I was so happy that she was with us, and so grateful that everyone did so well. I actually cried when I saw her (something that I hadn't done before) but I felt the same emotions with her as with the other kids (just in awe at how beautiful and perfect and how in love I was with her). I am grateful for the medical staff, and for their expertise, professionalism, kindness, and understanding bed-side manner. I am grateful that Aveya seems to be a strong nurser. I am grateful that I was able to rest a little last night and during the day, although I’m not sure if sleep ever really came. I am grateful for the quiet moments that Melissa and I got to spend together just with our new, beautiful baby. I am grateful for the feelings I have when I hold her and see her eyes. I am grateful that Melissa is doing well physically and emotionally. It was so special to see the kids see and hold Aveya. Cambria especially was so loving and tender and she held and looked at Aveya. It was so sweet. Corbin also was gentle and loving. I am grateful for the miracle of life and the role of families in the plan of salvation.

for you viewing pleasure... 

look at that tired momma. Tired but so happy!!

Corbin meeting his little sister for the first time.

Look at that smile! I have a feeling they are going to be bff's 

"all the girls!"

first pic as a family of 5!!!

She posed herself

going home from the hospital!

I love newborn smiles!

Girl confirmed!

I had a midwife appointment yesterday and asked if they could double check my baby's gender since it was so unclear during the ultrasound. (They have a handheld device, so it wasn't like I was asking for another ultrasound).

The midwife came in and tried. She checked and baby had her legs crossed, like a proper girl. She said she couldn't get the right angle, so she grabbed the tech on duty. The tech tried with the little machine and then said "this is pointless! Come into the ultrasound room"! I was so excited!  She moved and wiggled the wand and eventually she said "oh! I see girl parts!"

That was that! I feel so much better knowing for sure! 

365 gratitude day 277

Cambria felt Aveya kick today! I'm grateful for wonderful moments like that!

Did we decide on a name?

This pregnancy has been so different in so many ways. One of which has been baby names. As soon as I knew I was pregnant, I felt like if this baby was a girl, this baby was going to be Aveya (as long as Jonathan didn't veto it). I'll have to write a different post about the history of the name.
When I was in Utah, I was talking to Amy (my sister) about boy names, and she mentioned she loved the name Declan, but couldn't ever get Tony on board. So I asked her if I could use it. I immediately texted Jonathan and he didn't hate it if the bat! That is huge!

I mentioned to him later that if baby was a boy, I thought "Hinckley"would be an seating middle name. Declan Hinckley, doesn't that sound amazing?

Long story short, we had a girl and boy name that we were both ok with long before we knew the gender of our baby.

Well... today we had "the talk" and we both feel like there's no reason to keep calling this baby "baby", or even "baby girl" so we started calling her Aveya. As long as it really doesn't feel right, that's probably her name!! Things just got real over here!

So baby girl is probably Aveya Leanne. (Leanne is both mine and my mom's middle name, and we are both the second daughters... it's just too perfect to pass up)

Is it a girl baby or a boy baby?

We found out the gender of our baby today! We wanted to do it a little differently this time, so we had the ultrasound tech text a friend, who ordered cupcakes for us. Then we ate the cupcakes and there was pink frosting in the middle!! We are going to have a girl!

... I think. The tech said that baby was being pretty modest, and kept her legs tight together the whole time. But the tech felt confident enough to tell us it was a girl. I plan on asking my midwife to check again (since they have a hand held device) just to be sure. But this baby has always felt like a girl, but I didn't want to admit to it just in case it wasn't...

We are really excited!

Baby moves

Jonathan felt baby move for the first time last night. I know, it seems really early for even me to feel them, but we both felt a kick at the same time!

This pregnancy has been such an easy ride (aside from the initial stress when I started bleeding) and it has been easy to forget that I am pregnant. Now that I can feel movement I feel like things are going to feel real pretty quick. And if baby is on my mind more, I will probably connect with baby more (which is something I've felt like I've missed out on with the pregnancy being so easy.)

I'm excited! Pregnancy is so exciting!

365 gratitude day 235

Today during fast and testimony meeting I had a realization. Like I said in my last post, I've had some minor bleeding associated with my pregnancy. Throughout the bleeding (aside from the first time I started bleeding) I have felt very calm. That is usually not the case, usually I am very nervous for most of the time. I recognize that this is the Lord sustaining me.

I felt very strongly when we were thinking about getting pregnant that the Lord told me to trust Him. I was worried because I don't feel like I have it all together, in fact, I feel very much the opposite.

I realized today, though, that He is sustaining me for putting my faith in Him. My life isn't easy, my burdens aren't made so light that I can't feel them, but they are lighter. They are heavy enough for me to gain some spiritual muscles, but they aren't debilitating. And I think they could be, so I thank Him for that.

And I'm thankful for that realization today.

Let's make this blog official

I've told my immediate family, and I've announced it on Facebook, so now it's time to make it blog official too.

We are expecting our third baby in February! I am 15 weeks along and feeling great. I have had a little bleeding, but I'm starting to realize that's just normal for me. I've gone to the doctor a few times and baby is growing nicely. We feel very blessed, and nervous to be planning for another baby!